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Another Open Letter to Another Angel Baby

My Dear Little Peanut,

You came to us at such an unexpected time. We had a plan and knew your brother was coming in June. When we first found out about you, I think my reaction was different than the rest because I just didn’t think you’d come so soon. I always heard of those getting pregnant after adopting, but this just seemed quick. I also was worried, because I wanted to be able to give my best to both of you and worried I wouldn’t be able to with how close in age you’d be.

I’m so sorry that your life with us was spent with my worries. I’m also sorry my guard was up. When you experience loss like this so many times, you almost grow numb to it. Please know that doesn’t mean you were not loved. In fact, you always will be. You are with your two other siblings in a world I haven’t gotten to see yet, but we will be reunited later in life and I will get to hold you. For now, I ask that you be a guardian angel to your brother on earth that will soon join us.

This loss was different. I knew I was losing you before it happened, but now that loss is here and I am grieving you. I grieve the short life you lived and the life you didn’t get to experience. Please know my sweet, sweet angel- you will always be my peanut and I will pray to you and for you daily for the rest of my life.

Love Always,
Mom

This was the day we found out 💕

I’ll always cherish these photos and the brief two weeks we had with you.

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