As I'm driving home from work today, I randomly think about my fertility app on my phone. I won't tell you that I actually updated my calendar while driving....but back to my point. So I updated where my lovely lady business is in regards to ovulating and "aunt flow." Then this beautiful message pops up, your fertility window is open. This may seem silly, but that phrase became a symbol of hope and new beginnings for me. For you to understand why, I think some updates are in order.
After the miscarriage and Christmas season, I made a decision to leave my job. Something just clicked and I had to make a change. I am not saying the job itself is what caused the miscarriage, but I do believe the lifestyle I was living did. My job was almost 24-7 and I hadn't found a way to turn it off when I was home. None of that was conducive to having a child. So I searched for jobs I knew would still provide the mental challenge I yearned for, similar income, yet better hours. I know it sounds to good to be true, but that is exactly what I found. So my time in education ended and I entered the insurance world. To paint you a picture, the position is a commercial lines underwriter. Think of it as an insurance investigator. I work 37.5 hours a week, have an hour lunch everyday, it is located in Lansing (now a 34 minute drive compared to 48-70 minute drive), and I am out by 4:45. My work stays at work and I get to be Jessica when I'm home. The minute I changed jobs, I felt so much stress disappear.
Eventually my husband and I decided that living in Fowlerville was no longer needed since we both work in the Lansing/Okemos area, so we put our house on the market and recently accepted an offer. Our next adventure will be moving to Okemos. Okemos is our favorite city and removes the commuter life we have been living. I really think everything has lead us to this and I am optimistic that our new life in Okemos will bring us our sweet little one(s).
Another aspect that helped me get passed the miscarriage was my monthly visitor finally arriving after 3 months. I knew I couldn't get pregnant until I had one and it felt like I was forced to stay in this terrible purgatory while waiting for it to start. Then finally it happened last Wednesday and ended today which means we can start trying again.
So as I see the message on my phone about my lovely fertility window, I felt a new sense of hope and peace. Who knows when it will be, but I believe in there power of prayer and all things happen for a reason. Everything lead us to where we are now and having a baby seems that much more possible.
After the miscarriage and Christmas season, I made a decision to leave my job. Something just clicked and I had to make a change. I am not saying the job itself is what caused the miscarriage, but I do believe the lifestyle I was living did. My job was almost 24-7 and I hadn't found a way to turn it off when I was home. None of that was conducive to having a child. So I searched for jobs I knew would still provide the mental challenge I yearned for, similar income, yet better hours. I know it sounds to good to be true, but that is exactly what I found. So my time in education ended and I entered the insurance world. To paint you a picture, the position is a commercial lines underwriter. Think of it as an insurance investigator. I work 37.5 hours a week, have an hour lunch everyday, it is located in Lansing (now a 34 minute drive compared to 48-70 minute drive), and I am out by 4:45. My work stays at work and I get to be Jessica when I'm home. The minute I changed jobs, I felt so much stress disappear.
Eventually my husband and I decided that living in Fowlerville was no longer needed since we both work in the Lansing/Okemos area, so we put our house on the market and recently accepted an offer. Our next adventure will be moving to Okemos. Okemos is our favorite city and removes the commuter life we have been living. I really think everything has lead us to this and I am optimistic that our new life in Okemos will bring us our sweet little one(s).
Another aspect that helped me get passed the miscarriage was my monthly visitor finally arriving after 3 months. I knew I couldn't get pregnant until I had one and it felt like I was forced to stay in this terrible purgatory while waiting for it to start. Then finally it happened last Wednesday and ended today which means we can start trying again.
So as I see the message on my phone about my lovely fertility window, I felt a new sense of hope and peace. Who knows when it will be, but I believe in there power of prayer and all things happen for a reason. Everything lead us to where we are now and having a baby seems that much more possible.
Happy to hear you have less stress from work and are finding that balance. :) sometimes things happen when we least expect it
ReplyDeleteAll I can say is my positive thoughts are with you Jess! You deserve everything wonderful that life has to offer! And please when it does happen and you crave some Lebanese dish, it would give me a pleasure to make it and ship it to you��
ReplyDelete